“Dues” story topic from Moth Story Slams.
It was raining and I woke up to the sound of my roommate beating the ceiling with a broom. It was loud and he was clearly very agitated.
We had moved into New York about the same time and, being from the same church, had teamed up to rent an apartment in expensive Manhattan. He was a Med student, I was an artist. Both of our career’s drew us to the big and dirty city where we figured by “making it,” we’d be bonefied.
The most difficult part of “making it” in New York is usually the expense. Rent for people in our circumstances is the biggest expense. Our apartment was on 204th street – the “nose bleed” section of Manhattan: 20 minutes to Times Square, just about an hour to anywhere else. New Yorkers jokingly call that section, “New Hampshire,” because of it’s distance from midtown, but for me and my roommate it was on the island and that was good enough. The apartment broker who found it thought the apartment would be perfect as the price tag was rock bottom. I was just happy to have a few feet of floor space in the big apple.
Hidden behind every wall of this apartment was a unique experience. It looked perfect when you walked in, especially for being relatively cheap: shiny wood floors, a fridge and kitchen area, a nice living room, and we could even see the sky from our windows. It still seemed fine enough when we learned at twelve o’clock on a full-moon night that there were dogs living below us. We didn’t get down-hearted hearing the rants and raves of a dysfunctional family on the north side of our apartment at one o’clock in the morning. The “very happily married and likes to express it at two o’clock in the morning” couple that lived above us was a little bit bothersome, but a pair of earplugs solved all three of those problems. Unfortunately, they did not solve what happened next.
Maybe you’ve seen a really horrible sci-fi flick where two or three heroes are in the middle of a large peaceful desert, there’s a beautiful woman in the company, and then everyone gets attacked by a swarm of ravenous insects. The heroes fight back with light sabers, guns, large pieces of wood, and one of the men in the company gets eaten – usually the less handsome. The other finally saves the beautiful woman by opening conveniently placed fuel tanks and lighting the entire desert (thus killing the insects) on fire.
This happened to me and my roommate in New York (minus the light sabers, blasters, and beautiful woman). In fact, if we had had light sabers and blasters, we wouldn’t have used them. It would never have worked. Our attackers were little brown bugs with antennae and large bellies, and they were invading our apartment. There weren’t five or ten, or even twenty of them, there were hundreds. We had no idea why or even how they came into the apartment; they were just there, swarming over the ceiling in complicated patterns that resembled something out of an educational science film. We killed piles of them during the storm (the rain apparently brought them out of hiding) and swept them into grocery bags. Then we threw the creatures into the trash chute and returned to the apartment to continue the battle.
In the morning we, of course, did everything we could to clean out our apartment from the creatures. Neither of us had ever lived on a moist island before and we assumed the attackers were bed bugs. We killed every creature we found in the closets and rooms, then emptied the trash, put all of our perishables in grocery sacks, cleaned behind the stove, and cleaned every nook and corner of the cabinets. We went to bed feeling sure that whatever had happened that night was over and we could sleep peacefully. We didn’t.
Instead, we woke up to the same experience, but this time the creatures were running all over our bodies. We both arose and repeated the process from earlier that day. We went back to bed, once again thinking we could sleep peacefully. We still didn’t, and this time our frequent trips with bags full of mutilated insects brought the attention of our next door neighbors – who had moved out of our apartment and into their current apartment just before us. They watched us for a few minutes with grim expressions on their faces before they finally told us, “cockroaches, we could never get rid of them either.”
Oh, thought my roommate and I, this is why a nice apartment like ours is so affordable.
Being determined students, we resolved to make the apartment work. We tried insecticide gas bombs, poison strips, obsessive cleanliness, and everything else. The roaches still came on. Finally, we looked around the apartment and realized that every wall had something unique about it. The north wall had the dysfunctional family, the ceiling had the happily married couple, the floor had the exuberant dogs beneath, but the wall to the south had nothing seemingly special about it: the roaches had to be coming from there.
We called the manager and he ripped out the wall and discovered, sure enough, that the roaches had been crawling from the basement trash room, up the chute, and into our apartment through the cracks.
He lit the trash chute on fire every Saturday for a month.
My roommate and I slept peacefully in the big city thereafter (with a little help from our earplugs).
Shopping Cart #MIM
Highlight from last week’s posts to @300words
There was an unsolved (to me) mystery in front of my library for several years. The library has a very bright Gothic feel to the architecture. There are several large spinnerets, colonnades, and jagged scaffolding all across the steep roof. The windows are long and thin with striped bars, and the front entrance has a royal archway with a grand stairway leading into the foyer. There is another staircase also that leads to a shaded arched balcony with locked doors. In front of the library is a statue of a beehive—our state symbol—and an American flag raised high on a flag pole. At the bottom of the beehive statue always rests an overloaded grocery shopping cart.
Naturally the shopping cart belongs to someone, but to whom was never apparent to me. Every day it sits there, loaded with black plastic sacks, tarps, blankets, and with grocery bags holding empty bottles tied to the side. Underneath it are milk jugs containing an unknown liquid covered by a rugged striped towel, and on top is a decent back-country backpack filled tight. Though many people pass, including tidy looking library administrators, no one ever touches it save the pigeons.
Today, the owner revealed himself. I sat down in the morning sunlight to observe the impressive architecture. Sitting with my back against a lamp post, I pulled out my sketchbook and scribbled. At exactly 12:30 I heard the tapping sound of someone approaching on crutches. A man in baggy pants, a tan hat, sun-glasses, and dark green shoes came stride by stride towards the beehive statue. Not wanting to spoil the revelation, I kept my head down and continued drawing. He approached the shopping cart, took some bird seed out of a plastic sack and fed it to a pigeon, then picked up one of the water bottles and drank generously.
Then he left again, unworried that the shopping cart would be stolen. Thinking that he was careless for leaving it unattended, I returned to my drawing. But when I glanced up at my drawing subject, I saw him staring back at me. He had climbed up the second stairway to the shaded balcony and was observing me through the stone banister. I didn’t want to stare or cause trouble, so I continued my drawing, and he continued staring for at least a quarter of an hour.
When I finished my drawing I looked back up to see him, but we was invisible again. I gathered up my drawing utensils and zipped up my backpack. I passed by the grocery cart and observed that it must indeed hold everything he owns. As I walked into the library I passed by the shaded balcony with locked doors. When I drew near enough I could see him lying on his back, his legs crossed, and a pigeon on his hat, enjoying the cool shade.
—-
Bryan Beus
w: www.bryanbeus.com
t: @bryanbeus
Posted on June 21st 2010 in Commentary, Story | No Comments »